Last Wednesday was the anniversary of my mother-in-law's death. I planned to write about it- about her, but when I sat down at my computer, the words wouldn't come. I didn't want to rehash the events leading to her death. I didn't feel like sharing stories about the good times. What I was feeling was rushing inward, I couldn't reverse the flow.
She was a good friend to me, more than my husband's mother. She called me her first daughter, not her daughter-in-law. And when she lay wasting away in a nursing home and told me, "I just want to go home and let nature take it's course", I seriously considered trying to make that happen for her.
I still feel guilty that she had to endure the extra months that doctors gave her as they tried to keep her alive. I know that sounds strange for a loving relation to say, but those last months were filled with frustration, confusion and humiliation for her. And in the end, she died in a hospital alone.
So what does this have to do with Taylor Hicks? After she died and we returned to our sad, quiet home, I saw that joyful character singing a Christmas song on TV and wondered if he had a CD out. I got online, typed in his name and was directed to graycharles.com.
I found a lifeboat in a sea of despair and have ridden that sucker all the way to this moment here with you. My mother-in-law would have liked the fact that I found such a life-affirming diversion and that through Taylor's music I'm able to make a joyful noise in everything I do. I don't know why-I don't CARE why, but that boy has given me hope and an excited anticipation for the future.
So last Wednesday when I sat staring at my computer intent on writing about my mother-in-law, a funny thought popped into my head involving a playful discussion at TFHZone about whether or not Taylor had a clone. An hour later, I had the following photo. It made me double over laughing and you can BET my mother-in-law was right there with me.
She was a good friend to me, more than my husband's mother. She called me her first daughter, not her daughter-in-law. And when she lay wasting away in a nursing home and told me, "I just want to go home and let nature take it's course", I seriously considered trying to make that happen for her.
I still feel guilty that she had to endure the extra months that doctors gave her as they tried to keep her alive. I know that sounds strange for a loving relation to say, but those last months were filled with frustration, confusion and humiliation for her. And in the end, she died in a hospital alone.
So what does this have to do with Taylor Hicks? After she died and we returned to our sad, quiet home, I saw that joyful character singing a Christmas song on TV and wondered if he had a CD out. I got online, typed in his name and was directed to graycharles.com.
I found a lifeboat in a sea of despair and have ridden that sucker all the way to this moment here with you. My mother-in-law would have liked the fact that I found such a life-affirming diversion and that through Taylor's music I'm able to make a joyful noise in everything I do. I don't know why-I don't CARE why, but that boy has given me hope and an excited anticipation for the future.
So last Wednesday when I sat staring at my computer intent on writing about my mother-in-law, a funny thought popped into my head involving a playful discussion at TFHZone about whether or not Taylor had a clone. An hour later, I had the following photo. It made me double over laughing and you can BET my mother-in-law was right there with me.
(I know, my hair looks kind of weird, but I don't care. Well, maybe I care a little. If only I knew how to photoshop bangs!)
2 comments:
I like to come here as you keep thing possitive. I've been at some of the fansites and some just make you feel bad as the natives are restless and have too much time to think and overthink, mostly overthink. I check your site out everyday.
Wow! That's so nice of you, jojosie. Thanks.
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