Sunday, August 3, 2008

The Best of Times, The Worst of Times

Today my husband and I took a drive to the shore to look at some more beach houses. It's a two hour drive with ample time for us to talk.

Usually I hate taking a long drive with the man. He prefers to drive with the radio off. I know! Driving and singing loudly along with the radio go hand in hand in my world. But, today the absence of music was OK. We talked about our troubled son and his physical problems. We agreed that the boy has had it hard.

Thursday morning Jake came to me complaining of stomach pain. He was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome years ago when all the specialists and all the tests we had done failed to find anything wrong. He was told that he would have to learn to live with it.

Thursday morning I spent FOUR hours with him as he screamed, rolled on the floor and kicked whatever was nearby. He kicked one of our doors so hard it finally flew off the hinges. He would just have to learn to live with it? Are you kidding me?

He's twenty years old and can't keep a job or finish a course at the local college because of this pain. He's disabled by it.

Tomorrow we're seeing a new gastroenterologist and though I don't expect much, maybe, just maybe this doctor knows something the other doctors didn't. Jake needs help getting on with his life.

And so my husband and I talked as the miles rolled away until we found ourselves at the realtor's office. I lost myself in the task of viewing houses, judging the quality of sand and dunes and water. I sat on one porch in particular and looked out at the sea, smelling the salt air, listening to the waves and the screech of gulls. I forgot all about my cares back home.

I needed this day. I needed a break from Jake's heart-breaking troubles. Still, when we climbed into the car and started the drive back I couldn't help but feel guilty. I wondered what kind of a day he had had. Was he writhing on the floor as we drove? Where is his break from the body he inhabits?

My head is filled with images of a clear, blue sky and yet my heart is cloudy. I hope we get some answers tomorrow.


Anonymous said...

Hey Caryl,

I hope all goes well tomorrow with Jack and the new doctor. Dont forget the name of the drug I'm talking. It does help relieve the spasms that come with IBS.

Don't feel quilty about taking some time away, it's needed every now and then. Keep us informed how he is doing!


Chicken & Waffles said...

Good luck tomorrow with Jake and good luck to you and Greg in finding your little piece of paradise.

JOJOSIE said...

If you have a teaching hospital anyway near you, I'd head there with your son. We have the University of Iowa Hospitals and Clinics is our state and it's the best on new treatments and diagnosis. I wouldn't go along with his previous treatments, no way.

Kenzie said...

I've heard of many different things for IBS... I'm not sure what they are, but I'm sure a different opinion is going to help out a lot. It never hurts. Good luck tomorrow!

Anonymous said...

Hey Caryl,

get online and order ballerina tea. give him a cup. he will be pooping his brains out and all the pain will go away - my mother-in-law and future daughter-in-law both have the same problem and it worked miracles for with the beach house.....Lori

Anonymous said...

So Cryl.. What's the word from the doctor? How is Jake doing? I've been thinking about him the last few days and hoping he's feeling better!


Anonymous said...

LOL.. My A is sticking on the keyboard.. I meant Caryl ;)

caryl said...

Our app't was rescheduled for Friday, so I don't have any news. He's still been having pain but not as bad as on Thursday.

Our whole area was in a tizzy on Monday because a tropical storm was on it's way. Schools and some offices were shut down. It came ashore Tuesday morning and nothing much happened.

So nice of you to ask, tf! I mean, tif (haha!).

Anonymous said...

Give us an update on Jake when you have time. I hope he is out of pain! Poor kid.